9. Leather and studs make it too hard to raise arm.

8. Refuses to wave to anyone whose bike is already paid for.

7. Afraid to let go of handlebars because they might vibrate off.

6. Rushing wind would blow scabs off the new tattoos.

5. Angry because just took out second mortgage to pay luxury tax on new Harley.

4. Just discovered the fine print in owner's manual and realized H-D is partially owned by those rice-burner

manufacturers.

3. Can't tell if other riders are waving or just reaching to cover their ears like everyone else.

2. Remembers the last time a Harley rider waved back, he impaled his hand on spiked helmet.

1. They're jealous that after spending $30,000, they still don't own a Gold Wing.