1. Any references to "corn fed" when talking about our women will get you whipped...by our women.

2. Let's get this straight. We have one stoplight in town. We stop when it's red. We may even stop when it's yellow.

3. We don't do "hurry up" well.

4. Grits are corn. You put butter, salt, and maybe even some pepper on them. You want to put milk and sugar on them then you want cream of wheat -- go to Kansas. That would be west.

5 The "Opener" refers to the first day of deer season or dove season. Both are holidays. You can get pancakes, cane syrup, and sausage before daylight at the church on either day.

6. Yeah, we have golf courses. Don't hit in the water hazards. It spooks the fish and bothers the gators -- and if you hit it in the rough, we have these things called Diamondbacks, and they're not baseball players.

7. We have lots of pine trees. They have sap. It drips from them. You park your Navigator under them, and they'll leave a logo on your hood.

8. You burn an American flag in our state -- you get beat up. No questions. The liberal contingent of our state legislature (all 4 of them) enacted a measure to stop this. There is now a $10 fine for beating up the flag burner.

9. We do not ever, ever, ever say the word you all, contrary to what Hollywood may lead you to believe. The word is y'all and it could be either 1 person or 101.

10. Tea--yeah, we have tea. It comes in a glass over ice and is sweet. You want it hot--sit it in the sun. You want it UN-sweetened--add a lot of water.